Back to the Basics: Why Sexual Assault Prevention Begins with Consent

130419-F-CK779-001

"It took me listening to you for me to realize that I’ve been raped twice."

WOW! It boggles my mind that any young lady wouldn’t recognize when she’s being raped. Why is that?

Is it because girls are so desperate for attention from a guy that they are willing to do whatever he wants just to get it, including having sex unwillingly?

Or is it that they have been conditioned to believe that what they want doesn't matter?

Do they think so little of themselves and their bodies that they don’t believe they have the right to decide what happens to their bodies?

In honor of Sexual Assault Awareness & Prevention Month, I thought it important to shed light on an issue that is more pervasive than most parents realize.

The Problem Defining the Culture

Sadly, I have enough letters from teen girls sharing their sexual assault stories, that I could post one every day for months.

And I’ve read way too many letters from girls who tell me that they wouldn’t say they were raped; they just didn’t want to have sex.

Or they say, they succumbed to pressure and just “let it happen,” like the young lady below: 

[Read more…]

Sexual Assault Awareness: Shining a Light on a Daily Issue

Stop rape.

April was Sexual Assault Awareness & Prevention Month. If you follow me on Facebook, you know that I chose to bring awareness to this issue by posting a new letter every day during April, from a student who had been raped or molested. I wish I didn’t have enough letters to be able to post one each day for an entire month. But, not only did I have enough, I could continue posting letters every day for months sadly.

Rape and molestation are happening at such epidemic proportions that I believe only bringing attention to them one month out of the year is doing a disservice to the issue. So, I’m purposely choosing to write a post about it after the designated month is over. I guess it’s my way of rebelling against a culture that doesn’t always acknowledge the severity of the problem.

Quiet as it's Kept

When I wrote a post to highlight Sexual Assault Awareness & Prevention Month last year, I shared a story of a young lady who had been date-raped two years earlier and had never reported it until she told me. Since then, I’ve continued to see a pattern of girls keeping their sexual assault/rape a secret. Even if they do tell someone, many times they don’t want to press charges or get counseling.

Unfortunately, many girls blame themselves when they are violated. They tell me they don’t want to press charges and risk going to trial and being interrogated as if they were at fault. They also don’t want to get counseling because they don’t want to replay the incident and the trauma and shame that comes with it.

Earlier this year, a high school junior who was raped by four guys in an abandoned house when she skipped school during her freshman year, wrote the following:

[Read more…]