Be Someone Who Matters to Someone Who Matters!

iStock_000011466729XSmallLife's most persistent and urgent question is, 'What are you doing for others?' ~Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

I’m sure you’ve heard the common stereotypes about teens—they are disrespectful, lazy, out-of-control, think they know everything, etc.

You may have even said some of those things about them. I know I did before I began working with them years ago.

A few years after I started spending time with students in the classroom, something changed.

Though I still saw some of the same behaviors I had seen before, their pain became much more glaring than their behavior.

So, I stopped judging them and started praying for them. If you knew some of the situations many of them are dealing with at home, you would pray for them daily as well.

But this generation of youth needs more than just our prayers, they need our time!

I’m always curious to know why adults these days are not involved with teens lives anymore. ~High School Student

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5 Things That May Increase Your Teen’s Likelihood of Having Sex

mother shouting at doughterIt’s not easy being a parent today. Your teens are inundated with so many competing voices that influence their decision-making. I certainly empathize with the countless number of parents that have reached out to me over the years, seeking advice on how to talk with their teens about sex. Sometimes it’s just as important to know what not to do as it is to know what to do. So I thought it would be great to hear directly from teens.

I believe the following letters will speak for themselves…

1. Yelling:

I thought I was in love with this boy until your class.  My mother has always told me these things, but she yelled so I didn’t listen.  I really want to thank you. Now I will be a virgin until I’m married. 

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Six Things I Learned from a Former Student’s Phone Call

Cell PhoneI received a call Saturday from a soon to be 22 -year-old young lady who served on the leadership team of an after-school club I worked with when she was in high school.  I had not spoken with her since she graduated from high school.

She began by telling me she had wanted to talk with me for a couple years, but had just built up enough courage to call me. She was reluctant to call because she was ashamed of her decision to begin having sex at 19 years old. She was also afraid I would be disappointed in her.

As I listened to her talk about how she was parented and why she made the decision to have sex, I heard some very interesting things that I would like to share with you:

1. Children need rules and want high expectations!

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A Mother’s Warning about Social Media…

Instagram

 

Last week I received a very disturbing and heartbreaking email message from a mother who follows my blog. She asked me to share her email message with my readers so they will never experience what her family has experienced.

 

Her letter:

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Fatherless Sons: Exposing the Epidemic and Breaking the Cycle

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For the past two months, I have been hearing a great deal about Oprah’s Lifeclass series on "Fatherless Sons," and was finally able to watch a full episode last night.

It was not long into last night’s show before I realized it would be difficult to watch the entire show without being reminded of the painful stories and letters that I have heard and read over the past 11 years.

One of the stories I was reminded of while watching was a conversation I had with a 9th grade young man four or five years ago. This young man waited to speak with me after class and shared the following: 

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Lessons from a Great Father!

 

 

It is easier to build strong boys than to repair broken men. ~Frederick Douglass

 

 

Last week I introduced you to Mr. Charles Johnson, who raised an adult son who made and has kept a commitment to wait until marriage for sex. In today’s post I will share Part 2 of my interview with Mr. Johnson. 

Before I share some of the actual questions and answers, there are a couple things that really stood out to me during the interview that warrant mentioning. 

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The Measure of Manhood

In February of 2012, I was speaking for a youth organization and the young ladies in the audience began lamenting about how it would be impossible to find a young man who would be willing to wait for sex even if they had decided to wait.  

To their surprise, a very handsome 27-year-old volunteer stood up and quickly informed them that there were guys out there that were waiting and he was one of them. This young man was Terrell Johnson.

Terrell attributed his decision to abstain from sex until he is married to the message his father gave him when he was young, a message that has continued throughout his adult years. The more I talked to Terrell about his decision, the more I realized that I had to meet his father, Mr. Charles Johnson.

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Why High School Boys Say “NO” to Sex!

Thank you so much for coming to talk to my class, I have a new perspective when I think about sex. I have a girlfriend of thirteen months, and when you mentioned that if you love someone you keep their best interest at heart, it really spoke to me. This is because I feel as if I do love her and I have never pressured her into sex because I know where she places her standards and I don’t think there is anything more attractive than that. And she is the only girl I have imagined having a future with. Because of your talks I have a better understanding of what is most important; and that is her, not parts of her. Thank you again for all you have said and all you do.

I am excited to share the last post in my series "Teens Tell All: Top 20 Reasons Why Teens DO and DON'T Have Sex" and I think you will be quite encouraged.

Check out the video below to learn what keeps high school boys from becoming sexually active and what you can do to help your son make the same choice.

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Why High School Girls Say “NO” to Sex!

I value and respect myself so I know I'm worth more than some physical pleasure with no commitment!

Finally! A post in my series where I share some good news with you. Today I'm talking about all of the reasons high schools girls give me for choosing to abstain from sex. 

Check out the video below to learn what keeps high school girls from becoming sexually active and what you can do to help your daughter make the same choice.

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Why Daughters Need their Dads!

Daughter&Dad

When a girl’s first date is with her father, 
all other men must measure up.
~Author Unknown

 

But what happens when a girl’s father is not actively engaged in her life?

Often times she makes poor relationship choices, becomes sexually active at a young age and spends the rest of her life questioning why her father did not love her enough to want to be a part of her life.

A teen girl tells us why:

We were discussing the “father issue” in class one day and a young lady gave the following explanation as to why many young ladies make poor relationship decisions and do not always demand to be treated with respect or recognize their value:

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